Drastic Change and a New Transformation.

I'm speechless.

The changes that I have gone through just in the span of 6 months, have transformed me into a women that I never thought I would be.

Listening to own-self rather than people's opinion seems to be an easier task which I took almost 27 years of my life to understand. Priority have to be given to self rather than anyone else as happiness is a choice. I know that many people will not agree, but happiness to me has a new definition starting a few months back.

I've come to a realization that happiness all this while for me was all about pleasing other people. Yes, I WAS known to be a people pleaser all this while. Everything was about pleasing everyone. I have STOPPED doing it. HOW?

This is what happened. I was scheduled to be married and to start a new life. Yes, married and a new life. I called it off with many personal reason which I do not want to disclose. Well, anyway, during the process of calling off the wedding, I was called with many "names". One of the famous word was a Bitch. Yeap, from being called a bitch, whore, gold digger by my very own.

They were saying like, wow, so your first ex was a pilot, current is an engineer and the next, let me guess, a doctor? I was shocked. And this issue made me realize that I have been pleasing these kind of people by sacrificing my own happiness. I made my decision by calling off the wedding for my very own happiness. My happiness was my career. I chose my career.

By choosing my career, I believe that many of you wont be able to digest the fact. I was not able to digest it as well, however, I managed to do it by choosing good people around me who don't label me or judge me with the decision I've made. I know calling off a wedding in a short span of time is a taboo in Asia. Whereby, the specific girl/guy won't be able to find any other partner. The girl/guy will be labelled as bad luck or a trouble maker. This labeling is done by all the aunties/uncles that are too free in life by stalking each other on social media. Well, yea, speaking of social media. This social media is a disaster. #facepalm

To all the aunties and uncles, please find some better things to do in life. Stop spreading stories here and there. By the way, this message is not only to aunties and uncles, it is also to all the teenagers who like to screenshot. Screenshots is a art of stupidity. I don't understand people who stoop so low till to screenshot everything what others has to do. I am a victim of screenshots as well.

I'm not pin pointing anyone, but being a victim of the screenshot, I have faced many problems whereby I'm not able to post even a selfie on Instagram, check in to any place, write a status on Facebook or even update my blog. Whatever I do, was being circulated all around. My Insta story has the biggest hit. I really wish to get notification from Insta whenever someone screenshot my story. I really wanna kill that Mother F*&^$%. Sorry for my language. But I really have no tolerance for these kind of people.

Now, I'm sure you guys have many questions like why don't I delete my accounts and create new ones. Well, I have a very solid reason to it. All my old pictures, vacations with friends, tons of memories, and what not. I really do not want to delete anything for this kind of problem.

While going thru this period in my life, I've gone into a really bad depression. I suffocated every single day in my life since that day. It has been the worst stage of my life. By being not able to share with anyone, I started listening to many good speakers, life quotes, enrolled myself in gym, reading and started guitar practice. Even while I was doing it, I was slammed many times by "many" people, that I look very happy after calling off my wedding. But they do not know what I was going thru, I was trying to divert my mind. People interpret everything I do is all about showing off that I'm happy.

If I keep indulging with sadness, when will I find peace and happiness? Should I cry all day? Not make new friends? Go out for movies and all. I keep getting harassment calls and what not. Should I just lock myself at home and not go out? Am I some kind of animal that deserve to be in the cage? All i did was one thing for my happiness, And I was boycotted by many many people. I don't really care NOW because at the end, they don't pay my bills and I don't please people anymore. You want to talk to me, I will talk to you, if not, please shut your mouth and turn the other side and not show me your fucking retarded face.

After all they have said this to my face, they still had the audacity to say stuff about my career. Many people tried to put me down by saying that by being a banker, I will not be able to reach the stars. As of today, I have reached and achieved what I wanted. I'm trying to be the best version of me. I will makesure that I become someone in life and shove on their face. Even, they said, Oh, your daughter have alot of money what, give it to people who need it lah. Don't let me slap your daughter right at her work place. How dare you speak to my mother like that? How DAREEEEEEEE!

I know what I did was not very right, I apologize for taking this step. But then, by taking this step I realized who stood there by my side. I know who are two faced and act like they care. To be honest, your opinions and your two faced fuck face does not matter anymore. You may be dear to me backthen but now, I realized that even shadows leave our sight in the dark. You want my help, I'll help you but I will never turn my face to you if ever I have issues. Sorry.

To those who are reading this, please don't stoop so low like the lifeless people I have mentioned above taking screenshot of my blogpost. And SIAPA MAKAN CILI, DIA RASA PEDAS.

I don't give a flying fuck to people who judge my life. This is new me and if you are offended by this post, clearly you're not wanted here. Please don't even come back.

Peace yo!

Thanks for tuning in and hitting 25k views! Thanks for your love.

XoXo,

Kaveen